我并不是故意要笑。
只是在那情况下，
我不得不笑。
不然，我这一路来的努力
就会失去意义。

on forgetting the past..

i thought i was ok.
i thought i had forgotten.
but now i know,
i didn't forget the feeling.
it's just that i didn't want to remember.

becoz they say:
nothing improves the memory more than trying to forget.

but i know the feeling has faded, and it will,
little by little.

Time is the antidote for a broken heart,
if the person allows it.




*meeting u is fate,
befriending u is my choice,
but loving u is an accident i cannot control.

straight forward or just expressionless?

wel, i was reading the 'memory book' for kmm version last night n i notice a lot of ppl say that i've got 'my style', straight forward personality. but i think that i am rather someone who doesn't know how to express my feelings? i know i'm not 'kayu' nor 'blur' but i think that the weak side of me is not shown to other ppl. Ppl always c me as a cheerful, happy-go-lucky person becoz i never wanted to show my weak side to others. somehow, i now have the ability to smile even though i feel like crying? now, is it a good or a bad ability? ha.. i do wished that i can be someone who is more truthful about one's feeling rather than pretending to be strong. i think i will be working on that one step at a time.. so, any tips guys?

finally!

tadaima! mina-san!! ogenkidesu ka??

yeah baby, i'm back!! matrix life ended two days ago on my birthday!! now, it's the beginning of 4 months rotting holidays!! muahahaha.. jealous leh~~

wel, since it's my birthday, my frens gave me a surprise bday party, planned by Sush n Gary.. aww.. haha.. i thought only the PG square humans would celebrate for me, mana tau, even the guys also came... wahaha.. we had a great time but somehow or rather, the atmosphere is weird between this two gang of ppl.. haha.. wel, i'm somewhat in the middle so, like this lor.. dinner was nasi goreng belancan for one last time, and still the aunty add EXTRA cili padi when the order is 'KURANG PEDAS'. haiz.. my roommates made a video for me.. so touching eh? ha.. n thankfully, they decided to skip the water splashing part which i'm really grateful for.. then on my birthday, i took pic with a tons of ppl and went home.. well, i couldn't say i dun miss my frens, but i definitely prefer home.. we will meet soon what~~ kaka.. :]

mum approved of my traveling plan and i'm excited!! can't wait for that day to come.. i'm currently busy cleaning n clearing out my room.. so i'm not bored yet.. :D

to all my matrix fren:
first of all, thanks for everything!
secondly, i'm sorry for all the troubles i caused,
n last but not least, friends forever and keep in touch!

#Life is like a railway station. People come n people go. those who like you will keep you clean while those who hate u will try to destroy u.. but always remember you are not alone. for every railway station, there will be a track that will always be there and the track is called love.#













*sorry for not uploading the pics from my b'day.. jih xian still haven upload tham to fb.. T.T