first up, happy new years guys!!! it's currently 07:18 n i can't seem to fall asleep.

because i'm feeling troubled.
i still haven get out from the scarred wound in my heart n i cant take a step forward.
i kept thinking of the wat ifs n i keep back out.
wat if he reject me? hw am i suppose to face him in the future?
would i get scarred like the last time? hey, it took me quite long to recover.
y did love come nw? why din it come earlier?
y was i born a year later etc.
i am not who i am a few weeks back.
shall i give up or shall i continue? will i regret if i let go of u nw?
i am at a loss. can someone pls lead me the way?

really, love is for the brave only. cowards like me, pls give way.

20-12-2012

if the world does end tomoro, the only regret would be me not having a boyfriend before, not being by my family member's side due to the stupid presentation tomoro and not having tang yuan for tong zhi.

but even if the world does end tomoro, i am thankful for my awesome family member's love and support when i'm down and stressed up, my crazy friends who never fail to make me laugh even when i'm about to cry, the good advice, lessons and guidance everyone i met through my current 20 years of life gave me and the you who makes my heart beats a little faster these days.

and if the world does not end tomoro, i pray for a stronger heart which can withstand harsh treatments, a braver me to initiate new foot steps in new areas despite the risks, a happier me who loves and listen to myself more, a good family member who is always there for them, a better friend to those who appreciate me and a good catholic who is closer to God.

and with this post, i welcome 21-12-2012 with a peaceful heart because i know that God is with me even though i'm all alone in my hostel room.

dear heart

dear heart, it wasn't that long that u came back completely to me.. pls try ur best to not leave me so fast would u?? it aint the time to be worrying about it nw.

the unexpected turnout

i cannot believe the fact that as i am typing this, i am crying.
who knows i would have cried for such reasons?
i myself din see that coming.

n maybe i felt someone else's feeling.

was it because i wasn't supported so i feel down?
or was it because i was hoping for some push or calling back to stop me from doing it?
or was it because i had high expectations of u guys who i love so much?

i am at a lost. guidance anyone? i prefer serious with humor talk than serious serious talk.

ps: i love u babe, and i am thankful and touched but i was still crying when i was chatting with u. the only time i laugh was when u said i wasn't allowed to commit suicide. :)

confused mind

u know, i used to like being a leader, organizing things etc.. but the older i get, the more i hate.. especially organizing gatherings for my high school mates. it's not tat we are not close enough, but maybe just maybe distance n time changes people. i mean, yeah, i know everyone's very busy with stuff n i'm extremely free rotting away at home but i really do feel disappointed when not much cared to give me some feed back on the event page. if u can't go, just say u can't go.. at least give me some response so i can see whether i should change date or watsoever.. u know, it's the big group that is troublesome. i don't like it tat i may have the tendency to hurt someone's feeling by not inviting someone or just choosing a date i like tat everyone have to follow so i ask for opinions but no one bothered to give response. i don't know wat to do to gain a win win situation. screw u guys! humph..

I

Will use my not-so-thin-nor-fat legs

with little luggage, a good camera and a tiny notebook

single or with good companions

to roam this bigenourmousawesomecolourful world

and live life to the fullest.

but first,




i gotta go study.. LOL

last month of sem 2

few updates now..

last day of study week... sem 2 finals coming..
4 more days to doom's day, or is it not?? haha..
applied anatomy dun understand, haven touch exercise therapy.. so.... ><

few days back we had fire drill during study week of SEM 2 at 12.30am with not even half the students around!!  awesome organizing of the kolej isn't it?? *sarcasm*


anyway, me n roommate went to secret recipe to study last wednesday for the air-con since it's freaking hot in kl.. seriously, the waitress there has attitude problems.. is it my fault to make u wear glasses coz u can't see???
grr...

n now, me n roommate have no study mood.. need help!! haha..

so, happy studying people!! 

i have a dream..

i have a dream... 

to travel anywhere...

with my best buddies...

randomly....

when will it happen my dears???

i wonder...